Leaving the ANME January show, my colleagues and I were mulling over the state of the industry. We couldn’t put our finger on it, but something was missing. We were coming off holiday sales and should have been revved up and ready to rock and roll. Instead, the show ended with little fanfare and we all went back to ramping up for Valentine’s Day sales.
Hints of coronavirus were floating about, but nothing too, too scary. We always go through the ANME flu and it’s bad. Did some of us have it then who are immune now? Who knows. The road warriors who spend 20 to 30 weeks on the road were booking trips as they normally would. By the end of February, the news of the coronavirus was heavily covered, but still no real panic.
Rather than lament the ‘good old days’ and be afraid of this ‘brave new world,’ we should, instead, demand our place in commerce, not take the scraps we’re given.
On or about March 9, Los Angeles was taking the threat seriously and mumblings of quarantine were in the air. On March 13, Los Angeles closed. The Shots party in Ibiza was roaring and U.S. citizens were being encouraged to get home to the U.S. before the shutdown. Flights were getting routed to one of 13 U.S. airports and self-quarantine orders were in effect. An air of disbelief was heavy, but soon, we all realized this wasn’t a blip or a one-week event.
As everyone has been adapting into this new normal of physical distancing and inventing ways of doing business without being in the same place, it is clear we have a great deal to learn. It’s also clear we are the second-class to those needing aid in times of a global pandemic.
The pleasure product industry is no stranger to being left out in the cold when it comes to small business benefits. But as states and the federal government started drafting small business aid packages, we all witnessed the carve-out exception for our industry. Before we jump to demanding equal treatment, let’s be careful what we collectively wish for.
Mainstream? Really?
Unpopular as it may sound, in the days of adult pleasure product semi-normalcy, the hint of taboo made us special, different, edgy and cool. Let us all thank the founders for getting us past the illegal back-room deals, FBI raids, and Supreme Court cases. Then, let’s all remember that good things often go too far.
There was a very sweet spot in time, after our products became legal, but before they became mainstream. Sales were brisk, we could command a fair price, knowledge was power, and everyone stayed primarily in their respective lanes and we all did good work!
Now we are in a time where we are mainstream when it’s convenient. When big stores want the revenue from selling pleasure products by the truckload, we’re mainstream. But, we are taboo when it’s convenient, too. Municipal regulations, banking, and others want us to be taboo to exclude us from the economic benefits of the communities in which we live and work.
Rather than lament the “good old days” and be afraid of this “brave new world,” we should, instead, demand our place in commerce, not take the scraps we’re given. Hindsight’s glasses are often rose-colored and trust me when I say that video conferences are not new or brave. (Unless you don’t wear pants, then video conferencing can be very brave.)
Adult pleasure products aren’t bad or evil. We are not at the mercy of Walmart or Amazon or Target or Walgreen’s. We invited, some may say begged, them to come in and then we gave them free rein to determine our practices and pricing.
The solution to making space in free-trade commerce requires all parties to join in business practices that bolster our industry. Manufacturers, ecommerce providers, resellers, distributors and educators must come together in driving requirements of Amazon and the like. Of course, manufacturers want to sell as many units as they can at a profit. Of course, re-sellers want to offer both education and a pleasant shopping experience in their stores to make a profit. Of course, ecommerce providers want to have easy and affordable credit card processors and access to consumer software providers that do not discriminate, in order to make a profit.
However, none of this is possible if we accept things as they are and don’t design the change we want to see. The ecommerce giants are not our governors; they are platform and service providers that once activated, are not easily put back in their proper place within the pleasure product trade.
As we are in an unprecedented environment right now where sales reps are grounded, some distributors have had to cease operations, and anyone who is not Amazon, et. al., has had limited success in staying open; and we should use this time wisely and to our advantage.
We can design our future and the place our industry has in global commerce. We can stop undermining each other and start developing a pleasure product business association that focuses on products, lobbies for fair treatment, and demands sellers abide by agreed and consistent practices in order to have the privilege of offering our product lines on their sites or in their stores.
We have both actual and natural leaders among our diverse and knowledgeable industry representatives. We have embraced the technology that allows us to be close when we are far, and we communicate easily without bias or animosity. We can continue to both learn from and support each other in a way that has us leading the sales environment of pleasure products, not accepting our fate as if it is ordained.
Ann Houlihan is the CEO of CNV.com, Inc., the parent company of AdultShopping.com affiliate program, SexToy.com retail pleasure products, and SexToyClub.com wholesale platform.