opinion

Love Letters to <i>Black Size Queens</i>

I believe A.R. Gurney has become a porn publicist. The press release for the new West Coast Productions joint, Black Size Queens, features a head-scratching conversation between one of the male talent and his size queen counterpart that I'm sure isn't replicated as dialogue in the film. Male Talent: Is that fear in your eyes or simply the look of anticipation? Your big, thick, juicy lips wrap themselves around over a yard of my thick pulsating man meat and swallow down each and every inch. Did I meet your requirements both in stature and spectacle? Female Talent: The look you see in my eyes is that of one who is obsessed with your massive manhood. My honey pot drips in apprehension, part my lips and enter slowly so I can relish every moment. I am left quivering in ecstasy, spent and used. While a yard, last I checked, is three feet, these remain very powerful words. I have added a little dialogue for connoisseurs of high quality erotic literature. Male Talent: I am going to slap you on the head with this thing, you vulvalicious tartlet, if you don't stop making those faces. They pain me. They remind me of something, someone, long ago, whom I also had to hit over the head with the six-foot railroad tie that dwelleth yonder my pants way. Please stop making those faces. I may cry. Female Talent: The look on my face is one of regret, frankly. Regret that we are involved in a needles war. A psychic war. Like Blue Oyster Cult sang about. Stop hitting me with that 10-foot schlong, would you? It reminds me of the pole that delivers my poor phone service. I hope we get paid in cash because Del Taco charges every time you use your debit card.

Copyright © 2024 Adnet Media. All Rights Reserved. XBIZ is a trademark of Adnet Media.
Reproduction in whole or in part in any form or medium without express written permission is prohibited.

More Articles

opinion

TeamSkeet Debuts Swappz Channel, 'Swapception' Feature

Chief Revenue Officer Brandon explains, “The inspiration behind ‘Swappz’ emerged from a growing market demand for niche adult content that pushes boundaries and explores the taboo themes and deal-striking handshakes of swaps.”

Alejandro Freixes ·
profile

FAN5 Looks to Shake Up Creator Platform Space

Since inception, the FAN5 team has sought to deliver a “superior, hassle-free platform for creators, designed by creators.” With a foundation built on principles of inclusivity, collaboration and self-expression, FAN5 wanted to distinguish itself in the competitive field, bolstered by integration with and into sister brand CAM4.

Alejandro Freixes ·
opinion

Disruptive Films Unfurls Taboo Sex Banner 'Deviants'

Disruptive Films is well known for its kinky and taboo storylines. Now, the studio looks to unfurl Deviants: a new brand that shows taboo sex in a different light, diverging from the often-grim tone of traditional kinky fare to present a new vision.

Alejandro Freixes ·
opinion

Brittney Kade Talks Big 'Career-First' for Adult Time

Brittney Kade’s first gangbang originated as an Adult Time “Director Showcase,” a creative opportunity the production team offered to Jim Powers, one of the studio’s regular producers.

Alejandro Freixes ·
opinion

On the Set: Welcome to Adult Time's 'Futa World'

Dressed revealingly in a yellow waitress uniform, Lauren Phillips greets eager customers Hailey Rose and Chloe Surreal. On a sign announcing the grand opening of “Dick’s Diner,” the apostrophe between letters k and s bears a striking resemblance to an ejaculating penis.

Alejandro Freixes ·
profile

Hayley Davies: From New Zealand Math Nerd to Fast-Rising Adult Star

Growing up, New Zealander Hayley Davies was a proud nerd who participated in mathematics competitions against students from much higher grades. Her good looks turned out to be a kind of secret weapon, causing peers to underestimate her intellectual acumen.

Alejandro Freixes ·
profile

WIA Profile: Inka Winter

Award-winning erotic filmmaker and ForPlay Films founder Inka Winter knows what she wants her films to be, and what she doesn’t want them to be. She seeks to depict sexuality that is mindful, based in human connection and trauma-informed.

Women In Adult ·
opinion

Free Agent Auteur: Casey Calvert Expands Her Directing Horizon

Now, having brought that highly-awarded polyamory trilogy to a close, Calvert is concluding the exclusive Lust Cinema directing chapter of her career and charting a new course out into open creative waters as a free agent.

Alejandro Freixes ·
profile

Collaboration Done Differently: Adult Time Discusses Ambassador Program

Since the launch of Adult Time in 2019, award-winning director and chief creative officer Bree Mills has actively explored collaborative opportunities with members of the performer community, seeking out talent whose values align with the company’s and who appreciate the type of content Mills creates for the multibrand platform.

Alejandro Freixes ·
profile

WIA Profile: Siouxsie Q.

Siouxsie Q has long been a committed artist and organizer. This dual path has garnered her significant recognition for both her creative works and her advocacy. Yet one thing that stands clear in Q’s story is that her motivation transcends mere acclaim.

Women In Adult ·
Show More