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Doc Johnson Debuts <I>Hellraiser</i> Masturbators

Indulge the Leviathan in your pants by purchasing Doc Johnson's new Enspiral Vibrating Love Glove, sure to bring a little bit of the underworld to your masturbating experience.

GramPonante.com's roving reporter, Pamtrona Eng, interviewed a group of Cenobites hanging out by Home Depot.

PE: Laslo, you are the eyes-sewn-shut underling of the Lament Configuration and now I am your publicist. Why are Doc Johnson's products so popular wth demons?

Pinhead: I'll take that question, Pamtrona. It is not the Enspiral Vibrating Love Glove that calls us: it is desire.

PE: So Doc Johnson only facillitates your sexual pleasure, rather than substitutes for it?

Pinhead: Yes, Pamtrona. That is the healthiest thing. I merely use these devices when The Female is not present, to stir my horrible wanting of her.

PE: Thank you.

Pinhead: Peace out.

Use Doc Johnson's products or your suffering will be legendary - even in Hell.

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