Tommy Gunn will be the co-host. He's nice and everything, but I don't care what he's wearing.
Questions of the four sponsors (AVN, Genesis Magazine, Adam & Eve, and WantedList) reflected the cynicism of the adult media.
"What's in it for you?" hatted Scott McGowan asked. "Will there be annoying pop-up ads?" Mike South asked. "Is it good for the Jews?" Luke Ford asked. "Will there be a Nicest Female Porn Writer Award?" Cindi Loftus asked.
The answers were, respectively: Exposure, No, Always, and Write-in, but these exchanges were not to the point.
Only my "What are you wearing, Carmen?" accurately represented what the fans wanted.
WantedList's Ahn Tran said that the security measures built into the voting process were proprietary and developed in-house for these awards. "There will be multiple levels of e-mail validation, among other things," he said. The company might sell the process for other awards shows, such as the one I'm developing, which I will call the Grammys.
Adam & Eve's Bob Christian delivered a refreshingly non-spinny explanation of how the companies could benefit from yet another awards show. Fans will be provided 29 names in 12 categories with space for both a write-in within the category and a wild card write-in category unto itself.
"We already know who our customers are and what they buy," he said. "This will allow us to identify what people who aren't our customers are interested in."
The FAME website is active now. Pre-nominations will continue until May 1, then five names from each category will be available for rating until the presentation on June 24.
Winners will receive a trophy with the category name only (it will not be personalized).
A further indicator of how the FAME Awards reflect real life is that Luvana did not know who her scene partner would be until she logged on to the conference call.
"I hope he's clean," she did not say.